I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
