you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
