It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
