This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
My pussy is not your playground.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
