is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
