I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
