I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Randomize
