you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
