Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
