i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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