you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
