So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
