We named our party play list daddy issues
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
So apparently I’m into choking now
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