Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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