let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
