I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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