Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
