i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
