: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
It's Friday. Sex?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
