I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
