How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize