Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
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Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
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I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Come on in and take your pants off
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