I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
