Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Randomize
