Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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