i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
