It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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