I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize