The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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