Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
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