You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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