so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
