And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
