You're my little dorito
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
