Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out http://tfl.nu/89tu
  Replies (40) Good night (1676) Bad night (7322)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix http://tfl.nu/3cn5
  Replies (11) Good night (676) Bad night (3646)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.

  (1-909): View more from California

  I worship thee.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed. (1-909): I worship thee. http://tfl.nu/jd00
  Replies (54) Good night (8260) Bad night (1237)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more. http://tfl.nu/2mzd
  Replies (17) Good night (1363) Bad night (7817)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already. http://tfl.nu/j86y
  Replies (10) Good night (7490) Bad night (1246)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work http://tfl.nu/e66y
  Replies (11) Good night (3914) Bad night (915)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking. http://tfl.nu/77kz
  Replies (9) Good night (3056) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet. http://tfl.nu/wpea
  Replies (2) Good night (2063) Bad night (1550)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am. http://tfl.nu/rp62
  Replies (8) Good night (799) Bad night (1089)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  yeah...that's gonna come up in court

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): yeah...that's gonna come up in court http://tfl.nu/wily
  Replies (3) Good night (931) Bad night (669)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/8wnm
  Replies (6) Good night (617) Bad night (1078)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover http://tfl.nu/dbpl
  Replies (4) Good night (883) Bad night (667)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember.. http://tfl.nu/rkzm
  Replies (2) Good night (793) Bad night (334)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep. http://tfl.nu/3psv
  Replies (0) Good night (356) Bad night (273)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy. http://tfl.nu/4eke
  Replies (8) Good night (789) Bad night (464)

Randomize