You're so nebulous sometimes
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
