I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
i out mim tonsoeep
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