Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
