one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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