Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
pray to the hookup gods
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
