you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
