I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
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In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
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We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
we should paint friendship bongs
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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