Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
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I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
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Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.