i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
