no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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