Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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