You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
why do cheetos always look like penises
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You made out with two different species that night
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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