6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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