I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
