She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
