i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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